


Hunger

by damnbamon (orphan_account)



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Drama & Romance, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Marriage, Musicians, Romance, Sexual Content, Singing, Year 1994
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-11-03 13:38:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10968351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/damnbamon
Summary: After spending five years of her life being abused by her no good husband, Bonnie Bennett-Hayes flees Texas with her daughter. When she arrives in her hometown of Mystic Falls Virginia hoping for support and solidarity, things don't go as expected. While trying to start her life over, Bonnie finds hope and kindness in the most unexpected person.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This story contains some scenes of domestic violence / abuse, recants of past abuse. It also contains graphic to explicit consensual sexual content.
> 
> Note: This story takes place in 1994.

The yelling was the best of it. The ringing in the ears after his voice had pummeled into her ears was a easy punishment for Bonnie to swallow. The coolness of the tile floor beneath her body at two in the morning had become part of her solace, and she ached for the time of day when standing over a hot stove was the sweatiest she ever was. For Bonnie there were worse things than sleeping on the floor, slaving over a stove, and being cursed that; because the truth was, she wasn't sleeping on the floor. She was unconscious there. The red and purple marks along her body were from the fists that were thrown at her once he was unable to yell anymore.   
Standing over the hot stove was the closest thing she got to comforting warmth.   
  
Five years in, she felt hopeless, helpless, useless. It hadn't started out so violent. At first it was passive aggressive comments, and agitation over things she had little control over. Bonnie watched the comments, and flustered conversations about silly things turn into paranoid questions, and the paranoid questions developed into accusation, blame, punishment. Their problems were not solved by talking, or even arguing, their problems were no longer being solved. Before Bonnie knew it, they didn't have any problems, and no matter how quiet she stayed, how little she moved, breathed, left the house, it only got worse. Her husband's hands only caused pain, and his voice only headaches, his gaze condescending. It was as though Bonnie was buried deep in her own grave, before even having known she was dead; and the kicker was, her husband was telling her she'd dug her own grave. As though she had been living happily, but one day picked up a shovel, and chosen to bury herself so deep that pressure of the soil, clay, and rocks left the scattered bruises along her skin, and the worms wiggled in her brain and made her say stupid things. The stupid things taunted death, and that was why he hurt her.   
  
  
It was on a particularly hot summers night that the sting of his hand against her cheek was sending her over the edge. Bonnie fought as best as possible with the man before her. He was average height for a man, but his days as a roofer and ex marine had made him hardened, and much stronger than her. There was no wobble of his to use to her advantage. He was sober. There was knife to plunge into his neck, they were in the bedroom.   
  
"Stop it!" Bonnie screamed at the top of her lungs, and his hands moved to her neck. She kicked her legs and flailed her arms, shoving and hitting him. He grunted and growled at her. As her nails ripped at his face, she could feel the blood on her hands, but his hands tightened around her neck further. The air was running out for Bonnie, and her vision was getting blurry, dizzy. The faint found of begging, pleading, crying could be heard but she could barely tell whom it was coming from.   
  
"Let...go..of..me..." she gasped, and used her small underweight frame to her advantage, and placed her hands on his shoulder, pulling herself up, and ramming both of her feet straight into his dick and stomach. His hands moved from her neck as he stumbled backwards and she landed on the floor, hitting her head on the side of the bed.   
  
Bonnie struggled to her feet as her vision was clearing and grabbed the nearest thing she could find. It was a lamp, and it didn't stay in her hands very long. As it crashed into his head, he went still, but she could see he was still breathing.   
  
Huffing, she stumbled across the room, and grabbed a suitcase from the closet. She gathered clothes from her side of the closet in one fell swoop, anything that hadn't gotten into her grasp the first time was staying there. Bonnie grabbed the dark wallet off the nightstand and grabbed any and all cash that was in it, but left the credit cards. She dropped to the floor, and flung her hands under the bed to find her own wallet she'd hidden there, and a small blue box. She shoved her wallet into her jeans pocket, and the box into the suitcase, before hurrying out of the bedroom.   
  
Running into a small ugly yellow painted room off the living room, Bonnie turned on the light to see the small curly hair child sitting up in her crib, crying. She knew she had heard that... Bonnie set the suitcase down, and grabbed the diaper bag. she ripped the drawers out of the small white dresser and piled everything she could get into the bag along with the diapers that were already in there. Carrying the diaper bag and suitcase on the left side of her body, she balanced the child on her hip and walked rushed as well as possible into the living room. She used a great and quick amount of skill to get the baby girls shoes on and wrap her in a thin pink and red blanket, as well as grab the car keys.   
  
Bonnie was sweating bullets, and when she struggled out of the front door, she was barefoot. Huffing she got to the four door blue pickup truck that sat beside her husband's work truck. The blue truck was still in her name, she'd refused to put it in his name for over a year, and Bonnie was grateful she hadn't given into him.   
  
"Shhh, shh, it's okay sweetheart." Bonnie hushed the girl as she cried, and fumbled to get a back door of the truck up open. She tossed the suitcase, and diaper bag into the truck, and then bounced her child a few times.   
  
"I'm so sorry Emma" she whispered, wishing she didn't have to leave the girl crying, but she needed to for the time being. Bonnie put her into her rear facing car seat, buckled in her nice and tight, but took the blanket off since it was almost ninety degrees at eleven at night. Opening the driver's side door, she climbed into the truck, and put her seatbelt on. Starting the car, she backed out of the dirt driveway and into the road. Just as she was taking off down the road she swore she could hear him yelling from the front door...   


* * *

  
It wasn't until she was one hundred miles north of Austin that Bonnie finally stopped the car at a rest stop. Emma had stopped crying after about five minutes down the highway, and was thankfully still fast asleep. Unfortunately, Bonnie needed to get out of the truck, and knew better than to her leave her daughter there.   
She carefully moved the carseat out of the car, and carried it along with her wallet and keys into the main building at the rest stop. Emma only stirred a little in her sleep. Bonnie took her into the bathroom with her while she went, and over to the maps when she was done. Grabbing a map of the united states, she then walked over to the pay phone and wrangled a quarter from her wallet.   
  
As she shoved the coin in, punched a number in my memory, and listened to the line ring, the cool air conditioned air in the building made Bonnie sigh in a little bit of content. She knew she looked mangled though, by the look of people who walked by her. Though, she'd refused to look in the mirror in the bathroom. She could feel the pain of her new bruises, but, she was certain she wasn't bleeding from anywhere.   
  
"Hello?" A fimilar worried voice came from the other end of the line once the phone stopped ringing.   
  
"Momma, it's me...Bonnie. I know it's late." Bonnie spoke trying to keep her voice hushed by loud enough for her mother to hear over the drone of the rest stop.   
  
There was the sound of a wood legged chair scraping against linoleum. "Bonnie, sweetie, what's happened?" Abby could clearly hear the despair in her daughter's voice. Bonnie hadn't spoken to her mother in three months.   
  
"I...I can't explain now, but...I need to get away from Kyle. Can-I come there?" She questioned, looking down at Emma protectively. There was no way she going back to Kyle. Even if he threatened her, even if he tried to take Emma away. Bonnie wasn't going to give up Emma, or herself.   
  
"Is it really that serious? Are you sure y-" Bonnie cut her mother off, "Momma, yes. Just, please tell me if the door will be open when I get there."   
  
There was a slight sigh, and Bonnie could understand why Abby was acting the way she was. It wasn't anything knew for her; but, she trusted her mother would welcome her. She just needed to hear the words.   
  
"Of course. Your father leaves for work in two hours, but, I will be here until nine this morning." Her mother informed her and Bonnie chuckled breathlessly.   
  
"I'm in Temple right now. It's going to take me eighteen hours to get there momma, not counting feeding and changing Emma." Bonnie reminded her, and Abby seemed to be calculating in her head. "You should be able to get here by ten thirty tonight. I'll wait up for you. Do you need any money wired?"   
  
Bonnie pursed her lips. She was sure she had enough money for gas to get to Virginia, and she hated owing anyone money. She knew her mother would insist if she hesitated any longer. "No, thank you. I will call you from Dallas." She assured her mother. After a few more seconds of idle chatter, and Bonnie telling her mom that her time on the pay phone was almost up, the call was over. Emma was awake now, staring up at her mother curiously. Bonnie knew it would be only a few minutes before her daughter would start wailing to indicate she was hungry.   
  
"Alright, let's get back to the truck." Bonnie whispered, picking the car seat up and slowly making her way outside, and back to her vehicle. Once she got the seat buckled back into the tuck, she pulled Emma out of it, and took her in the driver's seat with the door closed but window open. She sat with the car on neutral.   Thankfully, despite Kyle's violence and mistreatment, Bonnie had managed to still be able to breastfeed. Moving her white dirty tank top down below one of her breasts, she held Emma there and let her feed. It took ten minutes before Emma seemed sated, and was falling back to sleep. Bonnie realized how hungry she was, and decided to stop at a 24 hour drive through. She could have gotten something from the vending machine, but she was hankering for some fatty, warm, and full of grease. Maybe two of those things. Plus a coffee loaded with sugar.   
  
Bonnie licked her lips just thinking about it...   
  
After eating with Emma sound asleep in the back, Bonnie drove through the remainder of the night and into the morning. She felt happier and full of more energy with her stomach full of two greasy breakfast sandwiches, two hashbrowns, and french vanilla coffee. By noon she was hungry again. She counted her money and decided she only had enough for another tank of gas, and one more meal. So, she made the decision to wait until mid afternoon before eating again. However, she had to stop to change and feed Emma every four hours, so by the time three came, Bonnie was not only starving but _exhausted_. Even with the anxiety running through her veins, and making her skin feel like it was vibrating. She was so out of it she forgot to call her mother when in Dallas. Now she was far from Texas.  
  
Running away from Texas, from Kyle, was nerve wracking, and exciting, and terrifying all at the same time.   
  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**Contains malnutritioned body details.**

* * *

**Chapter 2**

The sound of tires crunching on gravel as they rolled up the driveway at eleven in the evening prompted a welcoming porch light to come on. The home Bonnie had grown up in sat before her. As she took the key out of the truck's ignition, she watched the front door open slowly until a slightly shadowed but familiar figure was visible behind the screen door. Bonnie opened the drivers side door, slid out of the truck, and pushed the door closed in a tired but successful fashion. Opening the back door, she unbuckled Emma's car seat and pulled it out along with the diaper bag.

The screen door opened as Bonnie slowly made her way to the porch. Her feet still bare, pushed against the jagged rocks in the driveway until she was on the smooth sidewalk and then up the stairs. The Virginia air was much cooler than Texas, and the breeze wicked her sweat away. Though she was still much hotter than she'd prefer. The concerned face of Bonnie's mother met her eyes, and Emma's diaper bag was taken from her grip by Abby. The cool air inside the house made Bonnie sigh softly, and she carefully set Emma's car seat down in front of the dark maroon couch that was still in the same place it had been when she was last there.

"Bonnie, I'm glad you got here safe, when you didn't call me I was worried." Abby said to Bonnie as she closed and locked the front door.

The living room a quaint one, about the same size as the master bedroom Bonnie remembered was on the north side of the house. The walls were done with a light brown color, the baseboards and doors white. Much was the same, such as the oak coffee table, and matching brown recliners across from the couch. Yet, much was different; like the installed cieling lights, the 40 inch plasma television that much have cost a fortune...

"I'm sorry, I got so caught up in the travel I forgot to stop an call." Bonnie said in a low tone that was both intentional as to not wake Emma, and unintentional because she was tired.

"Look at you, you're exhausted." Abby said and stepped over putting her hands on Bonnie's shoulders. Bonnie found herself soothed by her mother's touch emotionally, yet, still she flinched. This caused her mother to remove her hands. "Please, tell me what happened? Kyle really hurt you?"

Bonnie sighed, and stepped a foot or so away from her mom. "Yes, mama, why would I flee Texas otherwise?" she questioned, with a hint of frustration in her voice. "I don't wanna talk 'bout it right now. Let me get some sleep, please?"

"There's no need to be snappy, go rest then." Abby said giving her a slight look of disapproval but not stopping Bonnie as she grabbed Emma's car seat and bag. Bonnie headed through the living room, and turned down a hallway that was off the living room and dining room. She followed the dim light from the living room that casted a glow down the hall, and turned into the second doorway on the right.

Setting the diaper bag down, she flipped the light switch, and that fimilar yellow tinted light on the cieling shone around the room. Bonnie closed the door behind her with a low creak, and sighed. Her childhood room was almost the same way she had left it in. She'd change a few things here or there when she came to visit last, and her parents had as well. The bed was a queen sized bed, instead of the twin bed she'd had during High School. The walls were the same color as the living room, instead of the pink and blue mess she had created in the 8th grade.

Bonnie smiled very softly, and set Emma's car seat down in front of the velveted seated chest at the end of the bed. Taking her shoes off, which she would have normally done at the front door, she slowly slid out of her pants and shirt. Bonnie leaned down, and unbuckled Emma from her seat, unwrapped the blanket from around her, and laid her on the bed to check her diaper. Afterwards, she sat on the bed with her daughter to her chest feeding her while trying not to nod off. Everything seemed to be going so slowly now that she wasn't running for her life or fleeing. The thought she could finally rest was lulling her even further to sleep.

After another few moments, she coaxed Emma into unlatching, and carefully set the bed up so that Emma was in the center with a pillow on the furthest side to the left. Bonnie turned the light off, and laid down to the right of her child, with a space between them, underneath the blanket, keeping Emma on top of the blanket. In the darkness, Emma wiggled closer to her mom, reaching for Bonnie's nose, and poking at her chest. Bonnie chuckled tiredly, and guided Emma's hands to her hand, and let her hold and squeeze on her hand. She hummed softly, and before she knew it, they had both fallen asleep at the same time.

* * *

Like a miracle, Emma hadn't woken up and cried the entire night. When Bonnie's eyes open in sticky fashion, light was already shining dimly through the curtains on the two windows of the room. She rubbed the sand from her eyes, and waited for her vision to clear. Her gaze moved to her daughter who was safe, also just beginning to stir. Bonnie yawned queitly, and then made a face when a unpleasant smell hit her.

"How didn't you wake up, huh?" she whispered at Emma, and sat up in the bed. The covers fall onto her lap exposing her bare torso. Bonnie noticed there was a stack off clothing at the end of the bed on top of the chest. Sliding out of bed, Bonnie picked up the clothing and looked at it all one by one.

There was a blue bathrobe; along with underwear, bra, tank top, and jeans. Bonnie recognized them all as clothing she'd worn in high school. There was even flower patches still on the butt pockets that she'd put there. She chuckled to herself. These will never fit. She thought. She hadn't been able to fit into her high school clothing since well, senior year. She was at least six sizes bigger than the Juniors Small she'd worn back then.

Nevertheless, the bathrobe was more than big enough, so she slipped it on, tied it to cover her naked and half naked halves of her body before grabbing the diaper bag and waking Emma up gently to change her diaper. After feeding Emma, Bonnie placed her in her car seat and went into the bathroom off the bedroom to take a shower. The warm water washed away all of the dirt, sweat, and blood from her skin and hair. She wasn't sure how long she had been in the shower, but once she heard the crying of her baby, she got out dried off quickly and pulled the robe on.

As she stepped into the bedroom, she saw Abby standing near the door.

"I can take her in the living room for a bit while you get dressed." Abby offered. Bonnie reached towards Emma for a minute and then relaxed.

"Thanks mama... I'll be out soon." Bonnie told her. She watched her mother pick Emma up and comfort her softly as she walked out of the room. The sound of crying faded as she got further into the house. Taking a deep breath, Bonnie moved back into the backroom, and shut the door.

She let the robe hit the floor, and grabbed the clothes. Much to her surprise, the panties slid on perfectly. The bra was a little too small but worked. What really caught her attention was when the jeans slid on, and had almost half an inch of space along the waistband still. The tank top was loose on her. Bonnie felt her heart pick up in speed, and her palms got tingly. She swallowed hard, and turned to look at the door length mirror, taking a step back. Her eyes shifted from the top of her head to her feet, and her eyes slowly filled with tears. Lifting her fingers, she traced the harsh line of her collarbones from the left side to the right. Those finger tips followed the line to her sharp edged shoulders. Bonnie's vision was clouded by tears, but her shaky hand continued down the front of her body over her breasts. They were full, but straight down from them she could feel the hallowed flat inward curve of her stomach. She couldn't bare to go any further, and slowly stumbled forwards against the mirror, her face against the glass. The bruises seemed to pale in comparison... With her teary eyes, she looked up into the mirror, enough to really see the sharp hallowed edges of her face.

Bonnie stood there crying for several moments silently, before she stood up, wiped her face off, and slowly began combing her hair. She pulled it back, but flinched at how her face looked, and put it back down. Licking at her lips, she tasted the saltiness of previous tears there, and her stomach growled.

As she entered the living room, she saw Abby sitting on the couch holding Emma in her arms, rocking her softly. Bonnie took a slow breath and crossed her arms under her chest. "Breakfast is in the kitchen, go ahead and get some. I'll be here." Abby told her, not looking up at her.

Bonnie moved into the kitchen, and the smell of food hit her hard. The clock on the kitchen wall above the sink said, 8:32am. Sighing, she grabbed a clean plate from the dish drainer next to the dink. Trying not to think about what she saw in the mirror, she piled on eggs, sausage, potatoes, fried tomatoes, and a few slices of toast. Grabbing a cup of orange juice, she headed to the dining room table. Sitting, she ate queitly, her mother not saying a single thing too her. She must have grasped what Bonnie had said the night before and was waiting to be signaled that she was ready to talk.

So, when Bonnie was done eating, she went over to the couch, and sat beside her mother. But, as she sat there, she realized her mother wasn't talking or looking at her, because of what she looked like. All the food in Bonnie's stomach suddenly felt like four inch nails. Swallowing her emotions, Bonnie reached over to take Emma from her mother gently. Her daughter was sleeping again.

"There's a crib in the attic, I can have your father set it up when he gets home." Abby suggested, and Bonnie just nodded. "I took the day off to help you."

"Thank you." Bonnie whispered, and looked up at her mother who still wasn't looking at her.

Bonnie took a breath. "Look at me, mama..." she said slowly getting no progress. "Why won't you look at me?"

"Bonnie I.." Abby whispered with a hitch her her voice, "I can't... You..you look so bad."

"Because Kyle hurt me, mama. He's been hurting me for years." Bonnie told her, fighting her own tears.

Abby's eyes stayed on the ground as she spoke, "It can't be this bad... It can't." She spoke as though she couldn't believe, no, like she didn't want to believe what her daughter looked like was real.

"It is. Mom, I.. I don't know how to tell you everything that happened because it just...it's so much; but, you have to believe me when I tell you it's so bad."

"Of course I believe you, baby." Abby said, turning to look at her finally, "I just wish I didn't have too. I'm so mad at that boy. How could this have happened?"

A few tears dripped from Bonnie's eyes and she wiped them before they could drip on Emma. "I don't know, I asked myself that for years, I still am."

It was silent for a few moments, Bonnie holding Emma softly, and stifling. Abby's eyes flickered to Emma and she looked suddenly pained to no end. "Did... You want Emma?" Abby questioned her.

Bonnie looked to the side for a minute. "Well.. I.. Mama.. Once she was born, I wanted her. Course...but, I didn't consent to her no." she swallowed hard, but looked down at her daughter and brushed a lock of dark curly hair from her small forehead.

"I'm so sorry." Abby whispered, and put a hand on her shoulder.

* * *

A few hours later, Bonnie was sitting on her bed thinking. For some reason the one thought she had in her head was, she wanted to make her own money, that she got to keep, and get her own place. Something she hadn't done in what felt like forever. Despite the fact that she knew she was in no emotional or physical place to be working, she pushed up off the bed, and rummaged through boxes of clothing in the hall closet. She found a collared gray shirt from her choir days, and pulled it on top of the tank top. Then she looked down at her arms, and saw the several bruises. Sighing, she grabbed a pair of black dress shoes, and walked into the bathroom. Abby had left to the grocery store, and taken Emma with her as much as Bonnie felt nervous about that, she was more nervous Kyle would show up and take Emma... At least if Kyle came there now, it would just be Bonnie...

Bonnie looked at the basket of her mothers makeup on the bathroom counter, and bit at her lip. She felt like she was in middle school again, except this time she covering up bruises and sharp edges of her face and not hickies. Grabbing foundation, she covered her face, neck, and arms in it, until her skin looked spotless and poreless. She used warm tones to make her eyes look less tired and dark. Putting blush on her cheeks, and a coat of pink lipstick on her lips. When she was done, she looked almost like she would have when she first met Kyle. Minus the weight.

Taking a breath, she hurried to grab her keys, and went out to the truck. Fifteen minutes later she was at Mystic Falls General Hospital. She sat in the parking lot tapping the steering wheel for ten minutes before she finally got out, and went inside. At the front desk she was greeted by a redheaded woman in her thirties. Judging by the friendly, and completely normal look the woman gave Bonnie, she thought she must have done a good job with the make up. Bonnie told the woman she was looking to apply to work at the hospital.

"Oh, you know what, we have been needing staff in emergency. Why don't you go up to floor 3, section G, and ask for Dr. Reynolds. I'll tell him you're coming up." The woman, name tagged, Meghan told Bonnie.

Bonnie nodded quickly, her head already feeling dizzy, and she tried not to sweat as she hurried to the elevators and went to floor 3. She made her way to section G. She only had to ask one person for Dr. Reynolds. A few moments later the blonde haired man in a lab coat, who stood only a few inches taller than her, with a beard grayer than his hair, came up to her.

"I heard you're looking to apply here?" He asked, "I'm Dr. Reynolds. Thirty year resident."

"It's nice to meet you, Dr Reynolds. I'm Bonnie Bennett...Bennett-Hayes." Bonnie told him, and realized her voice sounded a little shakily, she cleared her throat, "I've worked in two hospitals in Texas, I was in emergency, and mediations long term ward. I can give you the specifics if you like... My most recent empl...employment was a year and a half ago."

Dr. Reynolds eyes her with a bit of curiosity as she spoke, and then smiled. "You can fill out some paper work, and I'd be happy to recommend you. We are fairly short staffed in section G of emergency, as well as A and D. I'm head of all of them."

"Oh! That would be so helpful. Thank you Doctor." Bonnie said, a bit surprised that she'd be so lucky. But as she looked around she could see what he meant by short staffed. Some patients were just sitting in their beds with open curtains looked majorly annoyed. And nurses were fluttering around wildly.

As Dr. Reynolds was handing Bonnie several papers stapled together, there was a rush from the left side.

"Code blue!" Several EMT's shouted as they passed a gurney over to several emergency nurses who rushed over from their patients to the one in immediate danger. "Doctor!" one of the nurses shouted. Bonnie was blinked, her eyes trying to follow the situation.   
  
"I got it! Dr. Reynolds, assist." a voice said, and Reynolds who had already been on his feet started for the rolling gurney. And just to the side of him, Bonnie watched a black haired blurr disappear with the gurney behind two double doors at the end of the room.


End file.
